Here I go again delving into a field I have no business mucking about in. The world of the dominatrix is one that is not easily written about. The reason I am even venturing down this path is because that guy Seth Godin said something recently that I took to heart.

It went something like this:

The by-product of speaking up about what you don’t know is that you soon know more. And maybe, just maybe, the experts learn something from you and your process.

His blog post was entitled Stick you what you (don’t) know. More often than not this guy’s writing resonates with me. I don’t know why but it does.

So, what organ is most important to a dominatrix?

The brain is and more specifically, the right brain, and here’s why. But first, I love the word right because it’s a feel good word and it sounds just like something I love to do; write. Here’s a funny observation; people who are inclined to be right brain oriented or creative are usually not on the right when it comes to politics. Weird as it is. My intention is not to delve into politics here or the world of sadomasochism. I am very, very bad at the first and have no interest in the other (just to be painfully clear). Sorry. If it’s your coup de grace then you are in the wrong place. Bye, bye now.

If you are still here then THANK YOU. I appreciate you sticking around.

So, here we are, all together, with our brains. Us and the dominatrix.

Our lovely, lovely 3 pound organ.

Agreeably it has many, many facets and intricacies that make up its complex system. For the average Joe the brain is usually seen simply as a useful and generally valued tool. It works hard for us and for very little return. The brain is pretty selfless and is by and large a very tolerant organ. It’s maybe the most tolerant of all organs (except for the liver perhaps – close second). It’s really a wonder that, at times, that sucker just doesn’t flee based on the amount of abuse it takes on a day to day basis. Cue dominatrix.

Oh, how I digress.

Check out this advertisement.

Here’s what it says:

”I am the left brain. I am a scientist. A mathematician. I love the familiar. I categorize. I am accurate. Linear. Analytical. Strategic. I am practical. Always in control. A master of words and language. Realistic. I calculate equations and play with numbers. I am order. I am logic. I know exactly who I am.”

“I am the right brain. I am creativity. A free spirit. I am passion. Yearning. Sensuality. I am the sound of roaring laughter. I am taste. The feeling of sand beneath bare feat. I am movement. Vivid colors. I am the urge to paint on an empty canvas. I am boundless imagination. Art. Poetry. I sense. I feel. I am everything I wanted to be.”

It seems that it is pretty damn appealing to be a right brain, right? Looks like fun. Looks sexy. It’s hot. But then you have all those left brains saying that without us life would be in turmoil. There would be no structure. It would all FALL APART. There’s no CONTROL.

It’s a good thing we are not all ONE OR THE OTHER. Whew.

So, which one is DOMINANT for you? And does it really matter to know? F**k yeah. If you know, then the things you do, why and how you do them will make a whole lot more sense to you. Let’s hope.

Try this quick somewhat non-scientific quiz (here) to see which way you lean. I did it a few times and found out that I am actually right brain dominant almost 2:1 which is very left brain of me to say (I used my left brain to figure THAT one out – yowzer). Go figure.

Go ahead, try it. I’ll wait. If you missed it above just click here

Here are my results.

So? Are you back? Which one is dominant for you? Which one is your personal dominatrix? Are you surprised or did you know? The reason I ask is that I was actually surprised. It makes sense to me in many ways in why I do what I do in the arts and how I conduct myself as a leadership and management professional. Take a look at this list and see if you feel like you fit into these categories. Now these are not meant as absolutes (the right brainers will get that inherently). 

There are positives and negatives on either lists or you may feel an affinity to certain words based on your dominance and that’s the thing to remember; your dominance. I have picked out the ones that work for me and just like my star sign; they inherently makes sense.

What’s my point here?

It’s is really funny that I always seem to come back to that in my writing. Ralph, what’s your point? My point is that we all have a creative side. No matter what. Now you may say, screw the creative thing. I am all business! I am a PROJECT MANAGER dammit. There’s no time for creativity. It’s charts, numbers, spreadsheets, lists, graphs, critical path and the list goes on and on. You have to get people to PRODUCE and there’s no time to sit around pontificating about colour, flavour, drawing stuff, thinking about what could be or considering the random thoughts that come to you. Well, you know that’s bulls**t and so do I. 

• Everyone has a creative side. Shut up. Yes, you do!
• Use it.
• Use it to manage yourself.

Get out of your head once in a while.

Let your mind wander. Go to the park, walk to work and daydream. Think. Tell that dominatrix to shut up (just stay at arm’s length when you do). Use that right brain and if you are NOT dominant, who cares! Work on it. You work on other things in your life that are important so make this one of them. It won’t kill you to IMAGINE what could be. Then go ahead and use that left brain and make some s**t happen. I am writing this to you but I am also talking to myself.

Here I sit in my oversized elegant wingback armchair. Imagine me pounding my fist on a large thick encyclopedic leather bound ancient tome and yes, I am wearing an aubergine (fancy name for purple) velvet smoking jacket and a plaid silk ascot. There is a roaring fire (in a fireplace, of course) behind me and my 160 lb mastiff, Stella, is lying at my feet……….

……….as I impart my wisdom (damn, that’s funny to me……and likely just me).

Random thoughts and ideas are not crap! Write them down and go back to them later. Who knows what you might discover.

Listen to your intuition. You will likely be right (ha, correct maybe). You don’t have to analyse every situation all the time. Go with it on occasions and see where it leads you. It’s hard, I know.

Stop and look at the big picture. Take your nose away from the grindstone. Use that bean. See what it can do outside of your routine.

Try not to make up your mind so quickly. Ask for opinions. Get other points of view. Use that right side to see if there are other ways. You can ALWAYS go back you what you feel is right (there I go again, correct)

And last but not least poke some fun at yourself, your situation and your life. Do it before someone else does and get’s the joke first. Go on, just do it!

I don’t have a smoking jacket, or a wingback, or an ascot. I do, however, have a dog. Her name is Lilly and she is a 4 ½ lb Yorkshire Terrier who ACTS like a 160 lb mastiff. Sigh.

Good luck with your right brain and fight that dominatrix all the way.

• Which side is your dominant side and are you surprised?
• How do you use your creative side in your life?
• Why are you just staring at this question?

About this Author: Ralph Dopping (166 Posts)

A quirky sense-o-humour coupled with an indelible sense of stylish sarcasm makes it difficult to take the world too seriously doesn't it? My faves: fun, passion and hard work. I work here everyday: www.designdialog.ca